"You do not need to leave your room. Remain sitting at your table and listen. Do not even listen, simply wait, be quiet, still and solitary. The world will freely offer itself to you to be unmasked, it has no choice, it will roll in ecstasy at your feet."  Franz Kafka

That is truth.  Sometimes you need to have an imposed experience to learn the truth.  If this is not the truth, this blog will cease to exist.  Because it is our "blAHnde Moments!" when we realize the truth, life is right in front of us if we look at what we see around us.

How often do you just stop and take a look around and see your reality as it is rather than what you are looking for?  Listening now to the birds chirping and music playing I remember how grateful I am today.  I remember clearly many nites watching the lights fountain up The Plaza's marquee, two lights missing, finding a rhythm in its pattern, hoping that the desire for calm would find syncopation in the noises of the reality I sat.

"BANG. BANG. BANG."  Qwest* has awoken from his slumber as our cel reverberates in the loud banging sound that I imagine is a lead pipe striking a metal door, but knowing that in "the hole" he has nothing even remotely close to a lead pipe and it extends beyond my imagination how he can make such a loud noise.  Maybe he'll just go back to sleep.

"PUNK BITCH FUCKING WHITE HO!"  Nope -- no such luck he's up for another round of shouting at the top of his lungs.

Are the birds any less disturbing?  Are the kids in the living room?  What about the neighbor's barking dog?  There is always a dissonance in your reality to challenge your sense of balance and reality, embrace it and find where a new reality of balance and calm can find itself.

*Qwest, really, his street name.  How I learned his name is a whole different story.

DUK: Oreos are Vegan

Seriously, Did U Know, Oreos have no milk or eggs.  In fact, they were not even made or manufactured in a facility that processes milk or eggs.  How do I know?  Because after the "crackdown," we found out Oreos are Vegan when the kitchen gave us new dietary restrictions to help eliminate the fakers from our midst.

Why someone would choose to have vegetarian meal and then eat a Slim Jim ? ? ? jail.  sometimes, people in jail are challenged with continuity issues.

This was so short, I thought I would include a jailhouse recipe for a "burrito":  1 Top Ramen, 1 bag of chips (preferably Hot Cheetos or Nacho Cheese Doritos), 1 Slim Jim (optional).

Take your bag of chips, be sure to open it carefully because that bag will be what you use to mix and 'cook' your burrito, eat about 1/3 to 1/2 the bag.  After smashing the Tom Ramen in its package, empty the Ramen noodles in to the chips bag, smash, crunch and mix well.  Add Top Ramen flavor pack and optional Slim Jim. Mix well and add water, not too much, just enough to bring the "meal" together.  Once thoroughly mixed, fold in chips bag and "bake."

"Baking" in jail requires the only rule one must know and understand:  "Know your correctional officers."  To bake a "burrito" requires to put the bag on top of the light.  Just, do not get caught doing that by the wrong Correctional Officer!

Holding Cells Bare Responsibilities

Holding cells are fascinating places.   Everyone has a story in a holding cell.  If you think your story is unusual or that you are extraordinary in any way, you will find out how ordinary you really are in a holding cell.  The "Holding Cell" represents THE place where we capture every single "Mistake"  in our society and sort it out.  Including those made by a certain blonde.

I suppose it begins with "grounding" in high school or maybe even "go sit in the corner" or "timeout" when we are children, but The Question we must ask, to get to The Truth, is after we are adults does anyone have the right to take away another adult's freedom?  That is what I had to sit and contemplate for 11 days in the North Las Vegas Detention Center.

More was taken away from me in those 11 days than during the 120 Flat Time I did in Vegas.  Sometimes, for thoughts to expand in their potential, that which used to be true needs to be taken completely away.  I don't know if I ever consciously did that before they put me in jail, but I do know that I started to consciously do it in jail because that was all I could do to survive, let alone thrive, in that environment.

On very practical levels, human beings tend to adjust to more efficient models and ways of thinking -- "technology" is a good practical example.  It is on the very intimate levels, where the challenge of this expanding concept displaces realities you do not know even exist.   We experience the intimate levels in our everyday personal lives more readily than say the intimate impact of a new app on the iNet, but the same principles will apply.  And, in our emotional driven culture here in America, the impact of the shift in thoughts on the intimate levels very quickly is illuminated in our everyday reality.
  

"Perhaps it should be that the future unknown is our greatest mystery that teases us daily to find profound connection to this moment so that the future has a meaning greater than that which we know or can even hope to imagine.  If I'm really honest with that part of me that holds the gnosis my my being, this moment is the future I knew would exist.  And that gives me cause to wonder, of course, about how free is "free will."  There were so many points and decisions that *could* have changed this present reality, but in thinking of those choices and decisions -- save of course the 'blond moment' -- none of my decisions would I or could I have changed."

Having made that last bold statement from a jail cell was easy.  In reality out here where the choices of life are really all mine, second guessing is a game to be entertained.  And, not second guessing from a 'regret' point of view, and in that way my statement stands, but in the way of 'the blonde moment'.  After the "blonde moment" kicked in, what decisions were being made, what thoughts and emotions were behind them and the balance of the two in leading to the decisions that were made.

Not being aware of another person's corruption is the most common thread I found in listening to the stories shared with me in jail.  As a mom, I know sometimes a good "grounding" can be helpful; and, I like to think of my experience as such (even if I agree with Judge Dahl that the State of Nevada wasn't authorized to do what they did to me).  Awareness grows with deeper grounding into the experience of our own existence.

sigh.  time to meditate or something.